Everything at Once

I wanna be everything at once.

The lyrics of the song describe so much about myself. I wanna be everything at once.

Including the darkness, the negative and the power of the void.

As much as I loathe what binging and body obsession do to me, I am tempted. So tempted to think that I could, maybe, possibly be EVERYTHING AT ONCE.

But I can’t. I simply can’t ever be a normal eater. Denial does nothing for me except destroy me. Denial whispers lies to me that I could have one bite of a trigger food. I could have only itty bitty taste.

But I can’t. Especially at 12:41 AM. So I say goodnight instead. Off to read some literature then sleep.

Adieu. Thanks for letting me share. Together, we get better.

-Alayna H.