I have done many, many fourth steps since joining OA in 2014. I answered the OA 4th guide workbook questions, did the OA 12 Step Workshop forms as well as a Big Book approach with forms written by AA group I found online. Last February, I found Lawrie’s workbook (oabigbook.info) and followed the instructions which […]
Tag: Higher Power
The Decision to Follow True North
Step three is the decision to turn over my will and life to the care of Higher Power. As I mentioned in yesterday’s blog, the idea of Higher Power being True North and the other 359 degrees of the compass being my self will speaks to me on many levels. The Big Book discusses step […]
The Power Problem: We Agnostics and The Spiritual Experience
Once I accept that I am powerless over my compulsion to stop the mental obsession and trigger the physical cravings that start active addiction, I must decide if I want to continue in the cycle of white knuckle “control” and relapse OR seek a power outside myself to solve the whole mess for me. As […]
There is a Solution & More About Alcoholism: The Addict’s Hope & Hopelessness
Hope and hopelessness are woven through the two Big Book chapters, “There is a Solution” & “More About Alcoholism”. We are given a glimpse of the hope in step two, recovery through a spiritual transformation, then hit again and again and again with the hopelessness of step one, in particular the mental obsession. The genius […]
Bill’s Story: A Compulsive Eater’s Identification
When I first joined OA, I was amazed to learn all the ways I identified with Bill W as a Compulsive Eater and alcoholic. My life was very different than his, but the overall arc was the same. I feel different. I didn’t belong. So I turned to food. Later, like Bill, I discovered alcohol […]
The Doctor’s Opinion & Complete Abstinence
Christmas Eve I had a relapse. I was resting on spiritual laurels and not rigorously honest through 10th steps. Thus, the insanely trivial upset of my husband forgetting enough stuffers to fill my stocking triggered the obsession and sanity did not return, I did not turn to HP or the steps and tools of OA. […]
High Courage
The morning of my most recent CPA exam, I woke calm and grateful. After delivering my son to school, I went to the riverfront to jog and practice yoga, thus clearing my mind in order to connect with my Higher Power and remain calm during the test. While jogging, I saw the tanker High Courage […]
Hello, 5th Step. Hello, God. Hello, Me.
Thank you, God. I know You better now. I know better the me as You meant me to be for so long. The me You crafted with love and light. The me free from the toxic obsession with food and body. I better know how to live life – with love, honesty, consideration and tolerance. […]
life lived with color
denial is a bully, an instinctual artist born of fear and anger. eight-limbed, forty fingered, it uses its palette of extremes to blind us to our true selves. black and white, is or is not, truth or lies, light or dark, never room for the slow birth of dawn or the gradual goodbye of dusk. […]
Rigorous Honesty
I have been doing a Big Book step study with a sponsee in which we work the steps in tandem. As I contemplated the last question of the Step Three inventory, I was given an answer for my food and body obsession which has lately grown stronger. First, the context then the question. I have […]