I have done many, many fourth steps since joining OA in 2014. I answered the OA 4th guide workbook questions, did the OA 12 Step Workshop forms as well as a Big Book approach with forms written by AA group I found online. Last February, I found Lawrie’s workbook (oabigbook.info) and followed the instructions which […]
Tag: Binge Eating
The Power Problem: We Agnostics and The Spiritual Experience
Once I accept that I am powerless over my compulsion to stop the mental obsession and trigger the physical cravings that start active addiction, I must decide if I want to continue in the cycle of white knuckle “control” and relapse OR seek a power outside myself to solve the whole mess for me. As […]
There is a Solution & More About Alcoholism: The Addict’s Hope & Hopelessness
Hope and hopelessness are woven through the two Big Book chapters, “There is a Solution” & “More About Alcoholism”. We are given a glimpse of the hope in step two, recovery through a spiritual transformation, then hit again and again and again with the hopelessness of step one, in particular the mental obsession. The genius […]
Bill’s Story: A Compulsive Eater’s Identification
When I first joined OA, I was amazed to learn all the ways I identified with Bill W as a Compulsive Eater and alcoholic. My life was very different than his, but the overall arc was the same. I feel different. I didn’t belong. So I turned to food. Later, like Bill, I discovered alcohol […]
The Doctor’s Opinion & Complete Abstinence
Christmas Eve I had a relapse. I was resting on spiritual laurels and not rigorously honest through 10th steps. Thus, the insanely trivial upset of my husband forgetting enough stuffers to fill my stocking triggered the obsession and sanity did not return, I did not turn to HP or the steps and tools of OA. […]
Complete Abstinence
What is complete abstinence? It is zero slips. It is the act of refraining from my trigger food behaviors and trigger foods 100% of the time. I have had complete abstinence for the past few weeks, and I am working the steps ‘like my hair is on fire’. I had countless slips and relapses in […]
Hooked
pleasure masked danger. tasty tidbits floated before me, to and fro with the ebb of the sea. innocently, I ate and at once knew fulfillment. my first true friend. food filled me and comforted me during the chaos of childhood. Dad on drugs? Mom missing in a fog of depression, medicating with food? it’s ok. […]
Day 364
Today is day 364 of consistent, continuous abstinence. Day 1. Day 3. Day 46. Day 59. They were all were one day at a time. Day 364 is one day at a time. 3-6-4 Eve of 1. Eve of 1 year of continuous abstinence. 1 year, 365 days, made possible by living one day at […]
Mardi Gras and Abstinence
Fat Tuesday, 2017 I moved to New Orleans with my family in 2014. I never suspected moving to a city known for decadence would open me to recovery. Yet here I am enjoying recovery, one day at a time. Yet here I am lighter than I have been in 15 years. I am smaller than […]
100 Pounds Released
The scale this morning at the doctor’s office confirmed my suspicion that I have released 100 pounds since beginning OA in September 2014. To have released so much with so little stress and anxiety is simply a miracle. For the first time in my life, I am getting healthier one day at a time and […]
